GEEEZZ !! i met somebody weird -_-

oooowww la la la la la !!!!!!
GUESS !! TODAY I MET SOMEBODY THAT DAMN WEIRD !! AAWWW...THAT'S DAMN HORRIBLE ME -___-

okey !!
emang sih ini bukan pertama kalinya gw ktemu orang ini..tapi td kelakuan dia mulai WEIRD banget -_-
kalo ga salah dia ini anak ilmu sejarah..
gw sm dia satu kelas d mata kuliah umum MKI + KEWIRAUSAHAAN .
selasa-rabu berturut" gw sekelas ama si "weird" ini...
2 minggu belakangan ini kalo kuliah umum gw sllu ngrasa d perhatiin (ejiieee!!hahahhaa) .. but i don't care !

trus, tadi ! kuliah umum kewirausahaan .. presentasi tugas kelompok kan tuh , naah ! kelompok dia presentasi gitu , ngenalin produk makanan yg dia bikin sm kelompoknya , pas bagi"in produk makanan k orang" d kelas, dia ngasih produk makanannya k GUEEEHH !! AAAA... WEEEIIIIRRRDDD -_____________-

trus, pas kelas selesai .. gw kluar kelas belakangan , soalnya ngedanus dulu d kelas..hehehee, biasa deh koor danus kerjaannya jualan mulu .yasalaaamm -_-

temen" gw udah pada keluar kelas, dan gw nyusul belakangan , d luar,gw liat ada si "weird" itu , AND I'M STILL DON'T CARE -_______-eeyaaaa hahahhaa

waktu gw senyum k temen gw sambil ngelewatin si "weird" ini, tiba" dia teriak k temennya kyk gini "YAA TUHAAANN , GUEEE JATUUUHH CIIINNNTAAA!!!!" -_-
eiiitttsss...no ! gue ga GR cuy -_-
gw pikir dia ngomong itu bukan d tuju k gw , yaudah aja gw samperin temen" gw yg udh pd jalan duluan..
pas gw datengin temen" gw , temen" gw mendadak pada ketawa" trus blg "CIIIEEEEEEEEEE PITRIII!!!"
hah ? apaan ? eh ? kenapa coba ?
eh ternyata ternyata ternyata....kata temen" gw , si "weird" ini td bilang gini pas temen" gw lewat depan si"weird" .. "EH, GW SUKA DEH SAMA ANAK SASTRA RUSIA YG ADA TAI LALAT D IDUNGNYA!" -________________- GEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ...
please ! itu bukan gw ! gw gapunya tai lalat..eyaaaa-_-


abis gw ! abis!
horrible bangeeett...ooouuuooo..
mendadak males masuk MKU -_-

dan td , pas gw buka FB , GUEEESSS WHO'S ADDING ME ??? HEM...HE'S "WEIRD" aaaaakkhh -_-
otak gw absurd !

derri tolong aku ! aku d ganggu orang..aku takut..
heleeeppp T_________T

thankyou...

this is happening on march 05 2011 , 12.30 pm .

my geologist friend sent some message on bbm like he do as usual .
he say if he wanna share something to me ,and as usuali always become a good listener .
he starting his story with some question to me , and i've been answered it .
he told me bout his love's story ..
he said ,if he wanna say something to me , "what you wanna do, boy??" i'm asking ..
"are you like if someone honest but that's hurts or lie but could make it happy, choose what you feel better, please .." he asking to me ..
"honest but hurts better for me, cause lie it's never perfect..why??" i'm answering..
"hmm..i wanna say something honestly to you..but maybe it can make you hurts..can i??" he said..
"haaa?? hurts me ? why that's can make me hurt?? oke, i'll be okey. just say the truth now :)" i said..
"i do like you more than you know, i do like you since i know you although it never make me to know you so well...and this feeling kill me when i see you, i know my feeling will hurt you or anything..so sorry fit.." he said..
"HAAAAH ??????????????????? ARE YOU SERIOUS ???? I NEVER THOUGHT THAT HAPPENED ,OH MY........" i said..
"yeah..i'm serious for sure..soryy , i gave you shock sentence .. so, how's yours??" he asking..
"thankyou..i do like you too , but you have to know if our relationship never bloom..i can'n feel in love with you more than as a friend , you know it?? so sorry ,we'r best friend that you know :(" i'm answering..
"ohh..we'r best friend ?? okey..our relationship yes never bloom..sorry bout that , but i can understand what you feel with me .. thank's fit..now, let me to alone and think what i've done :'> " he said..
"okeeey...i'll let you alone..call me if you fell better , hey !! make your the best smile..sorry i can be yours , you'r still my best, boy :)" i said...

and that conversation the end..
he never call me for a several day..i can understand it.
oh god, sorry if i hurt somebody , i can't take him, sorry :(
i had my "boy" , i had mine ..
you know who i LOVED my god .. you know what i feel..
sorry i can give you smile ..
but, i'm so proud with your recognition, boy..
i'm so damn cherish your recognition :">
maybe, it's our the best relationship :)
we'r as a friend :))

please,smile boy..you'r good ! i knew you'll get the best girl in your life and than me for sure :))

ATM

coba ! kelakuan bego gw nih emang !!
masa iya td pagi , masih ngantuk , gw udah disuruh k ATM , ngambil duit buat masak , mata aja masih merem melek -_-

alhasil salah ngambil kan !!!!

masuk ATM aja nabrak !
seinget gw , gw mau ngambil 50 ribu , gw perasaan mencet angka 0 nya bener deh , ehhh ... masa iya yg keluah malah 500rb ????????????????
COBBBAAAAA !!!!!!
gw pikir ATMnya baek banget ngasih gw duit 450rb -_-
ya taunya ATM gw yg kekureeesss -_-
baaanggkruuuuttttttt !!!

nabung besok nabung !!! besok k bank HARUS !
tabungin lg 400rb nya -_-
kalo gw simpen sendiri yg ada tangan gw gatel pengen k toko buku .. NO NO NO HELL NOOOO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

otak emang susah d ajak kompromi nih klo lg ngantuk..
ABSUUURRRRDDD ABSUURRRDDD !!!

WONDERFULL work !!

tonight me and my AMAZING team got much experience :D
aaaaa NGAMEEEENNN !! it's 1st time for me :">
aisyah gave me responsibility here for it and i've been doin best i guess although it's still less :( but it's OKEY guys !! we'r TEAM ! and we CAN DO IT together till we get SUCCESS soon :DD
we around the "jatinangor" small city tonight and got few money hahahaha...
i think, it's gave me statisfaction :>
and till now, i wanna take a pictures from every moment we've passed it guys ..
hmm,and it's 1st moment i had taken from us :)





that's amazing pictures..
we'r team , we'r friends, we'r family, and WE'R ONE for sure guys :">
i love you guys :D

next time we'll do it anymore and with full team ..
btw , for our team leader's AISYAH PUTRI and our other team RENI REZKINA, get better soon baby , we love you :> we really hope you all will could accompany us soon <3

3rd march 2011 <3

TODAY !!!

hahahhaa..
today, i think it's my happy day..
what ? cause i got too much something good :D

hari ini walaupun gw dateng telat (LAGI) ke kampus, tp untungnya masih boleh masuk k kelas..
trus di mata kuliah tolkovanije teksta, gw bisa jawab analisis kata dgn baguus .. YAYAYAYAAAAAYY !!! I LOVE LINGUISTIC CLASS SOOO MUUUCCCHHH :DD

pulang kampus, gw ketemu ikan lagi <3
yaaak ! gw mau spdc OR selamanya di depan gerbang ! bisa ga ?hahaha..
td gw balik sama fara, seperti biasa kalo spdc OR psti ada iko -___-
udah langganan bgt deh dia bawel kalo ada gw + ikan -_-
ikanku lg main trompet cuuuyy hahahah..
"teeet tooott teeeet" , dari gw turun angkot gratis udah aja deh tuh kedengeran suara terompetnya..hahaha,
si fara cuma ketawa" pas si iko godain gw ama ikan -_-
sebelumnya, dikampus gw sm fara udh ngomongin sepenggal kalimat ddlm novel djenar mahesa ayu yg baru, that's a damn sweet sentence i think and i feel it now..
gini isi kalimatnya, "SETIAP KALI AKU MELIHAT DIA, SAAT ITU PULA AKU MENABUNG RINDU" aaaaa !! what a sweet sentence :(
itu jg yg gw rasain k si ikan deh nih kyknya, soalnya udah satu minggu ini gw ketemu terus sama dia, and that's make me more and more missing him so much :'(

giamanaa dooongg...kalimatnya bikin gw galaaau -________-
hahahaa..
sepanjang jalan balik k kosan, gw digodain abis"an sm fara..
mulai dari dia blg "udh fit..yuk gw mau daftar spdc aja deh klo gni caranya, biar kita bisa balik k depan gerbang trus lo ktemu deh sm dia" hahaha..
"lo mau lambain tangan k dia kan? yuk ksana lg !!hahaha"
"lo mau ya jd terompetnya dia ? ciieeee..bahahahaha"
"bapaknya dia kyknya tukang terompet deh, abis dia bikin hati lo kyk di tiup-tiup terus sih !!"
"bapaknya dia tukang magnet juga deh kyknya, abis hati lo ditarik-tarik terus sih sm dia"
"nah kan !! hari ini tabungan rindu lo nambah lg k dia, udah gpp fit, tabungan lo bisa membuahkan hasil deh nntinya..lo kaya deh sekarang !hahaha"

hahahaa...that's a freakin conversation -___-

faraya sent some tweet for me on my twitter ,
she said "buat apa so sweet klo lo nya juga ga ditembak-tembak..itu sama aja periiihh fitrii" i think she's right , but it's a god plan for me :)
and fara sent me "yaudah gpp, waktu yg menjarakan, nnti waktu jg yg akn mmpertemukan"
hahahha..faraya's right for this time .. i like it so much..

i think, nobody's could ruin my mood today :)
i'm in a good mood .. thank's "ikaann"

i saw you for the second time in this week

i saw you in my real life..
i saw your smile juat for me..
i saw your eyes just look at me..
i heard your voice say something to me..
i look your act for a while..
but i can't feel your heart , can't feel it..
:((
i hold your hand for a while ..
its the first time for us, why ? why i being fool -__-
i think it's become real and too much :(
i really can't handle my feel to you..
wanna let you go with all your reason that you say..but , i can't take it :(
really, i wanna make my mind to say if i wouldn't anything from you..
wanna let you go ! go ! go ! go away !
how the way i can lie ? i can lie to myself, i can lie to other, but i can't lie to your heart -,-
that's so wrong , right ?
no no no no no noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo....i did wrong i guess ..
baby, i can't cherish your reason then :( i had lied :'(
so sorry ... not yet , no i can't accept your reason now..
altought i never know what your BIG REASON !! you never tell me ! did you think i have some magic to read your heart and know your reason with myself then ?
noooo...i'm nothing..
try to imagine if you're here, say something to me till i can understand with you..
i can't guess anything from you...
you're a full secret guy .. i too force myself to loving you..
here this time i have to release your hand ?
here this time i have to let you go away away away ??
here this time i have to cherish your reason without i never know ?
here this time i have to give up for my love ?
here this time i have to cry and dropped my tears for the last ?
here this time i have to stop loving you my fish ???
there so many reason for me ? what ?
honestly, to loving you i didn't need some reason, i just need to close my eyes and feel your heart, act, and all of you, there's i can feel love on you :">>
i think, love didn't need some reason to find the way to they bloom ..
they just need a time , need a respect, need a opportunity to make "it" BLOOM with all they way .. trust me, god has something perfect for us...
althought i really want you so much, but if god didn't let me to hold you all the time, i'll still loose you step by step..you trusted it ?
yep ! i love you,
i like you,
i need you,
i wanna hold you all the time,
i wanna give all my respect and attention for you,
but...IT'S ALL BEYOND MY POWER .. god has it , isn't me :'>

god gave you to me , god trusted me..
but god isn't let me to continue along with you..

hey .. follow your heart, don't follow your reason..
i'll looking forward for this hard situation, you too. right ?

should've i wait for you ???
should i looking for you ???
should i got my eyes on you ???
--"

my special sentence in korean for you

i've been made some special sentence in korean language for my "fish"..
i've long kept these words for you my fish..
i know you didn't understand with this language..but, just check this out..
if you know and understand this words, you can know what i want all this time :">



someday i want you say these words to me :'>

"derri ssi-ga naega namjachingu-ga doe-eojullaeyo??? derri ssi-ga...ttaemune naega joahaeyo..derri ssi...doe-eojullaeyo?? juseyo..derri ssi :">" naega neomu saranghaeyo *\^^/*

my “fish” last night, you come to my dream .. suddenly

hy my fish boy..

how are you today ? did you know, last night i dreaming of you ..

should’ve i’m happy now ? NO !! i can say NO for sure !! i’m not happy , i’m so affraid with you, cause in my dream you got sick :’(

very clearly, i can touch tou, i can hugs you, warm hugs for you cause you got a bad fever :(( i can’t stop to thinking of you :(

i’m so affraid with your condition ..

thought i’m so over with my dream last night ?? WHATEVER BOUT PEOPLE SAY !! i just care with you !

okey, i’ve asked bout your condition on twitter, sent some mentione to you, but..till now, you didn’t reply it .. hope you’ll be okey my fish :(

dunno why, this feeling come to my soul and my heart anymore after i can ignore your coming , after i could passed my pain of you :(

guess i’ve fall in love with you anymore ?

oh god , it is twice ? -__-

please god , i wouldn’t something bad happened to him ..

can you guard him to me ? please .. i’m begging now :(

okey , i knew i love him .. but, i too knew if i can’t be with him .. i knew you gave him to me just to be him as my friend :) it’s a perfect way god .. i knew it for sure :’)

just let me save him here <3

don’t let me to forget him :)

god , you hear me anytime and anywhere . i knew :)

thank’s cause you gave my heart to loving him , my “fish” :’)

for you fish .. “take care yourself , i got my eyes on you anytime and anywhere wthout you know it .. and, I LOVE YOU then my fish boy .. i will be here, still here when you need me ..i’ll be here for you , still healty and keep you smile baby :)”

wish i could meet you on my dream land anymore so that , i can take care of you .. don’t make me affraid dude :) love yaa <3

PS : for you, my fish “D.D”

새해복 많이 받으세요! с Новым годом !!

haaay 2011 :)
새해복 많이 받으세요!
happ new year for all people in whole world !!
feels the EUPHORIA ~~
too much memorize in last year , and thanks god i’ve been passed it :)
hope in this year i can be the best anymore than last year .
can get much things that i want ,
i wanna kneel down in front of you god , you’ve been gave me anything , happiness , sadness, mistakes , foolish , smiling , and other for my wonderful life , i love you my almighty god <3
i had important things in my 2010 :
*i have my lovely mommy who always loving me more and more <3
*i have my freaking brother who always guard me anywhere and anytime :D <3
*i have onie R bana and irma Meilina , someone who take care and make me laugh when i feel down . thanks my boarding house friend <3
*i have Muhammad susanto , he is freaking and PABO people lol , i think he’s my soulmate friend cause he always be here, in my side when i feel sad, happy, and whatever the situation !! ure my the best IDIOT friend dude :DD thanks for your support <3
*i have Faraya Maulida , she is my gorgeous friend , thought she is a GOOD friend !! she is like an angel for me , she gave me support when i feel down , make me calm down when i getting mad with someone , she helped me to understand all lesson in college :) she is the good friend for sharing bout our problem , bout the “boy”, family, college, and other . I DO LOVE YOU MORE AND MORE girl , ure the best <3
*i have my hulk Derri Dwima , my fisherman <3 but he just my friend , i can get him as i want .. but , it’s okey..i know we just to be good friend . thanks too for all heart , thanks i still can fall in love with you . ure good HULK <3 lol
*i have Yurico Iglesias, he is my ex boyfriend when i’m in second smstr :) just wanna say , thanks for all memorize dude :)
*i have Izmir Azlan as my friend who always loving me with his way <3 thanks boy :D
*i have Raynaldo , my cow :D althought we didn’t close anymore now . but , u still my bestfriend i’ve ever had . thanks baby <3
*i have Kenny Cariline as my friend who always beside me although she isn’r rare to make me so damn getting mad .raaawwwrr..but in deep my heart , i love you girl <3
*AND I STILL HAVE MY REAL FATHER , ALTHOUGHT I NEVER MEET HIM SINCE A SEVERAL YEARS AGO :( but , you have to know daddy , i LOVE you MORE and MORE .. i miss you so much than you felt to me :’) take care him for me god <3
*i have new house in serpong <3 i love my house !
*i have my HANDSOME cat <3 aawww..i buy him a several months ago , he is BOY !! wooww..i love my persian’s cat so so so much <3
*i have SHINEE, JINWOON, MIR, HONG KI, GI KWANG and DONG WOON as my fovorite kPop (oh nooo!! is that important for this post -__- i don’t think so..lol) , but i love them so much ! someday i will hug you one by one , can i ? do you want ? ROTFL!! (just kidding, i just fans buddy lol) <3
*i have Agustina Safitri as my lil teacher to teach me bout korean language , and introduce other kpop or other bout korean !! i like the way you teach me LOL thanks girl you’ve become a good friend to me , love yaa <3
*i have Indah RS as my enemy in my classmate .. please be nice with me in this year girl cause i too damn tired to serve you and all kinds of problems that you create for me.. but in deep my heart , i still recognize you as my friend . thanks for all trouble that you’ve made with me <3
*and the last , i still have YOU my GOD <3 know it that i love you :) thanks for everything you’ve gave to me , too much friend , too much trouble (disaster) , much people who loving me more <3 too much fortune , and lucky day <3 too much things that i have now ! thanks god , too much words for you and i can’s explain it , but one thing that i know , you love me more , and i do it too <3 THANKS my god :) still beside me as always and forever untill i’m die :)
and the last sentence or words i wanna say , BE THE BEST THAN UR PAST PEOPLE :D
make this year without mistakes :) make it right !!
makes your dream and make it happend :D
с Новым годом !!
새해복 많이 받으세요!
HAPPY NEW YEAR !!

my new gadget .

heyaaa..i had a new gadget ..
and i love it so much .. so so so love this gadget.
i've been so long waiting to had this gadget .
want to know what i mean ?
hmmm , this is a CAMERA DSLR SONY ALPHA 380 !!
yeaaay , so hard i'm waiting and keep my money for this gadget .
but , now .. i've been got it ~~
perfect !! i got it !!
my effort very very working :D
and , i'll say big thank's for my mom too , cause she's been help me to buy it :)
thank's my lovely mommy .. do you know ? i love yaa so much , i do do do moree than you love me :)
now , i can take more photo , anytime and anywhere :)

WOOHOOOOO.....photography world .. I'M COMIIIINGG !!!
:D

hellooo , you boy :)

when i act like this i realize i'm actually young ..
he's , right in front of me but i don't know what to do :(
how do did you start love ?
people who have loved, please..tell me..
will there be a day when i hold him hand ?
will there be a day when i kiss him above him closed eyes ?

HELLOOOO HELLOOOO .... i might stutter a little, though ..
who knows we might actually be together :)

should i confront , him ?
should i wait for him ?
it's harder when everyone else says something different , you can't believe it right ?
having high standards, this isn't a usual thing me, yeah...

will there be a day when i hug him freely ?
i believe that what we think can come true :)

this is not the first time .. thruthfully i've loved and parted..
but..it's hard , please believe me :(
you're different !!

HELLOOOO HELLOOO !! i don't know how you're feeling now !
HELLOOOO HELLOOO !! please , give me a chance :'(
i don't know how you're feeling now..
who knows we might actually...together :')
helooo , those times together circle around me and can be compared to no other blissful feelings no MORE i can't !!
express feelings anymore so if you take my hand never let you go if this love i'll never let it go !
WHO KNOWS US TWO ?!
this might be destiny ...

it's YOU .. the last you on my posting blog :')

this is your picture ..
sorry , i take this quietly on your facebook :)
this is the last posting i made bout you :(
i won't expect anything more from you . i'm promise :'(
let me show to whole world your face ... people i love , YOU :')



cute .. yeah , you'r cute :)
i can't get you heart , your attention , so .. now , let me save you in my heart so that there's not anyone who knows that i love you and never expect your being :'(
babaaaay :')
let me cry now , i don't wanna cheer up now . please :'((

should've ....

seharusnya gw bisa tahan perasaan gw ,
seharusnya gw bisa mundur pelan" kalo tau bakalan nyakitin ,
seharusnya gw bisa senyum diem" kalo tau dia gak akan pernah ngeliat k arah gw ,
seharusnya..
seharusnya..
seharusnya..
banyaaakk bangeett kata seharusnyaa d otak gueee !! aaaah !
I REALLY FUCKING FOOLISH !!!

selama ini gw berusaha spy perasaan gw gak terlihat sm siapapun .
berusaha perhatian gw gak terlihat sm dia .
berusaha harapan gw gak d sadarin sm siapapun .
gw udh berusaha bgt gak keliataaannn :(
tp kenapa masih ada aja yg liat perasaan gw :(
gw gamau bikin syp pun terbebani sm perasaan gw .. terutama dia :(

i wanna get closer with you ..
but it just my hope :(
don't look at me anymore , i don't want to be seen by anyone !
i want you don't know my feelings for you :'(
but , don't know why ,, suddenly i feel hurt and destroyed cause of this feeling :(
but , one thing i know for sure .. in deep my heart , all hopes , BROKE :((
no hope anymore .
i know for sure if all these have never BLOOM ! like you say :(
i understand it all . and i'll try to cheer up for you :')
don't look my tears , it's not important !
let's just say there never was any feeling in my heart for you :')

my feeling in deep my heart .

don't know why ..
i just had annoyed feel :(
don't know why ..
i just had too much hope :(
don't know why ..
i just feel hurt ...
when i knew , if i fallin in love with you .
i just have hope to you :(
hope you look at me .
hope you looking for someone , and it's ME !
hope you accept my heart .
hope you smile to me .
hope you write on my wall .
hope you sent text message for me .
hope you want me like i want you ..
hope that all my hopes on you too.
but , when i realize that it was all false hope :(
POOR ME !
i know .. i ADMIT that i LOVED him !
i admit it ! i'm not hypocrite ...
please ... look at me :(
my heart is beating when i thinking about you darl :')
did you feel it too ?
does you love the way i can ? cause baby i did it :)
this is so wrong , i can't go on . do you believe ?
i need to know should i fight for love or disarm ..
this pain in my heart :(
hear me ...
i don't want you know my feeling ..
i just want you know what i want , and doin what i want from you :'(
don't hurt me :(


please,
this is my feeling in deep my heart for you -derri dwima- (my double "D")

endah n resha - when you love someone :"(

rekomendasi dr temen gw pas gw lg bingung"nya ngadepin perasaan gw k org yg gw suka (derri) , katanya nih lagu gw bgt . pas gw denger , lah .. gw langsung nangis -,-" zz . tp bagus lagunya !! 10 jempol !!horeee \m/




I love you but it's not so easy to make you here with me
I wanna touch and hold you forever
But you're still in my dream
And I can't stand to wait ‘till nite is coming to my life
But I still have a time to break a silence
When you love someone
Just be brave to say that you want him to be with you
When you hold your love
Don't ever let it go
Or you will loose your chance
To make your dreams come true...

I used to hide and watch you from a distance and i knew you realized
I was looking for a time to get closer at least to say... “hello”
And I can't stand to wait your love is coming to my life
When you love someone
Just be brave to say that you want him to be with you
When you hold your love
Don't ever let it go
Or you will loose your chance
To make your dreams come true...

And I never thought that I'm so strong
I stuck on you and wait so long
But when love comes it can't be wrong
Don't ever give up just try and try to get what you want
Cause love will find the way....
When you love someone
Just be brave to say that you want him to be with you
When you hold your love
Don't ever let it go
Or you will loose your chance
To make your dreams come true...

love . love . love -,-"

ini deh nih dampaknya dr jatuh cinta .
tiba" jd suka lagu" yg ada hubungannya ama CINTAAAAAAAAAAAAA !!
kata" jd frontal menyinggung tentang hati atw org yg lg d cintain !
tidur jd mendadak gak nyenyak .
pikiran jd mendadak d bajak ama org yg d cintai itu .
yah , pkknya dampak dr jatuh cinta menurut gw banyak gak enaknya lah ...
aaaahh ! males -,-"

first time i meet him "derri dwima" :))

Gak panjang yg mau gw tulis d posting ini ..
Gw cm mau meluapkan rasa bahagia gw yg cukup banyak tentang pertemuan gw sm seseorang yg bernama "derri dwima"..
dia itu tmn gw , eh .. Apa yaa , hmm .. Okee , sebut aja dy tmn gw lah :)
Gw knal dy dr situs jejaring soaial "facebook" ,
dy satu kampus sm gw , cm beda jurusan aja sih .
Gw sastra , dy perikanan ..
daann ,, yg lbh aneh lg , slama kita kenal dr fb itu , kita blm pernah ketemu sekali pun !!
Hmmm , klo gw sh pengen bgt ktmu dy , tp waktunya aja yg sllu gak tepat :(
Dan , smp akhirnya ,, kmrn pas gw latihan bwt ospek universitas , ada SPDC gt lg latihan jg ,
Dan kebetulan jg , tmpt latihannya deketan ..
Mata gw terus tertuju k arah org" yg lg latihan spdc ,
d depan pandangan gw , pas bgt ada sekumpulan anak spdc yg lg mainin terompet gt.
Tb" pandangan gw tertuju sm 1 org cowo ,
Gtw knp ,, gw ngerasa klo gw knal sm org itu..
Yeeaaah , smp beberapa menit gw perhatiin org itu !
Akhirnya dy menolehkan pandangannya k arah gw ,,
dy liat gw jg , pandanganny sm sprti gw , matanya seperti berbicara "siapa yaa,,kok kyk kenal"
Gw pun meyakinkan pandangan dy , dan seketika gw melambaikan tangan dan tersenyum mengisyaratkan "haii derri , ini gw fitry"
Dan dy pun membalas lambaian tangan serta senyuman gw ..
dan mulai saat itu pula , entah kenapa jantung gw berdegup kencang..

Yaaah , yg pasti ..
Gw seneng ktmu dy :)
Heeii you boy , nice to meet you !
It's a good first meeting beetwen us :)
Honestly , I like you for now :))
Hope you too :)
and , hope we will meet again in other time and I'll give you my best smile :)

my LOVE when vacation time :)

liburan sekolah 2008 lalu ,
gw pilih liburan gw k bali , yeah .. tmpat dimana orangtua gw berasal .
sekitar 2 minggu gw disana , liburan dan sekalian nenangin diri setelah beberapa hari sebelumnya gw putus sm pacar gw .
setelah ngerasa tenang , gw pun mutusin bwt balik k jakarta by BUS "safari dharma raya travel" bali-jakarta naik bus ... yaaaa bisa kebayang laah..24 jam penuh d dalem bus yg emg bwt gw nyaman bgt . gw paling suka k bali naik bus d banding naik pesawat . lebih terasa jalan"nya .hahaha..
bwt sampe k jawa , bus pun harus nyebrangin laut yg menghubungkan antara pulau jawa dan bali . gilimanuk-ketapang .hmm..very nice :)
smp d kapal laut , gw pun turun dr bus bwt duduk d dalem kapal .. nunggu kapalnya sls mengantarkan gw dan bus yg gw tumpangi .. duduk d ruang tunggu kapal smbil nntn film jepang yg d play sm sii ahli tivi itu .haha..bengong kyk org bego , krn itu pertama kalinya gw pulang pergi k bali naik bus SENDIRIAN tanpa orangtua gw . oh god , I WAS VERY BRAVE !! :D
duduk sendirian .. nengok kanan-kiri , depan,belakang . berharap kapalnya cpt smp ketapang (nama pelabuhan d jawa) dan gw bs duduk tenang lg tanpa ada rasa terancam krn sendirian d tempat rame kyk gtu .. aaahh , akhirnya kapalnya tiba d ketapang ! yeah , my prayers were answered ! :))
saat gw beranjak dr tempat duduk dan mulai berjalan menuju bus , gw ngerasa ada yg sejak tadi memeperhatikan gw .. woow..i'm afraid ! gw cepetin langkah gw .. dan akhirnya gw smp d tmpat duduk nyaman gw d bus .. aaaahh,,i'm lucky :)

waktunya makan malaamm...
bus berenti bwt ngater semua penumpang mkn mlm d suatu rumah makan yg sedikit mewah ,, yeaah .. utk kesekian kalinya gw duduk sendiri .. saat gw makan , gw liat ada org yg ngeliatin gw dr kejauhan .. oh god !! ITU ORANG YANG TADI PERHATIIN GW D KAPAL LAUT ! oh no -,-" nafsu mkn langsung ilang .. tidaaaakk ! gw langsung kabur k dlm bus dan ninggalin makanan gw . smp gw msk k bus aja tuh org msh ngeliatin gw . ah , ada apa sm otak lo sih . gw annoyed bgt !huh.
bus kembali jalan dan gw tertidur lelap........zzzzzz..

MORNIIIINGGGG WORLD !!!
buka mata ,, ternyata udh pagi aja...
bus berenti lg bwt nganter kita sarapan d sebuah restoran sederhana untuk pagi ini .
yaaa gpp , yg penting perut keisi .hehe..kali ini rombongan dr bus "safari dharma raya travel" yg lain .. gw duduk d depan restoran smbil menghirup udara pagi yg segeeerr bgt . ahh..it's a wonderful life !
gw merhatiin semua org yg kluar dr bus safari yg lain .. and , anyone know ?! ORANG-YANG-DARI-KEMAREN-MERHATIIN-GW-KAYAK-MALING-ITU-TERNYATA-NAIK-BUS-SAFARI-JUGA-HANYA-SAJA-BEDA-BUS-SAMA-ROMBONGAN-GW !! aaaaaa..shit ! gw makin deg-degan dan takut..pantes aja dia bareng mulu ama gw klo berenti makan..tidak !huhu..
pas antri bwt ambil makan , gw bengong (seperti biasanya) , dan tiba" org d dpn gw membuka percakapan ..

org d dpn gw : "eh , duluan aja :)"
gw : "hee?! oh iya..makasi" (APA"AN NIH..INI KAN ORG YG DR KEMAREN NGELIATIN GW!!!ASTAGAA...KETEMU MULU..DAN SEKARANG DIA D DEPAN MUKA GW!!)
org d dpn gw : "koo ngambil nasinya cm dikit ??"
gw : (sambil ambil nasi) "oh..hahaa..iya :)"
org d dpn gw : "emg gak laper ???"
gw : (mulai kesel krn d tanya" terus) "hehehe..ngga koo" (sambil senyum maksa) "duluan yah" (ninggalin tuh org)
org d dpn gw : "ohh..iyaa :)"
gw : (senyum doang)

gw duduk agak jauh dr tempat dmn dia sm tmn"nya duduk...dr jauh dia msh ngeliatin gw tambah sesekali senyum k arah gw .. dan gw baru berfikir sekarang .. "yaa tuhan..GANTENG!!manissnyaaaa" (bego bgt kan ..lelet bgt nyadarnya!ah)
gw kembali duduk d depan restoran sambil ngeliatin bus yg gw tumpangin lg d bersihin .. dan ada beberapa bus dr rombongan lain mulai jalan , dr kejauhan gw liat "org tdk dikenal" itu melambaikan tangan k gw dan tersenyum...dan gw ?! cuma nunduk dan cengar-cengir malu...STUPID ! I KNEW IT !!ahhh...

stelah kejadia d restoran pagi itu , gw langsung kepikiran "org tdk d kenal" itu , dan berbicara dlm hati .. "kalau nnti gw ktmu dia lg..gw anggp dia jodoh gw !!amin"

LUNCH TIME !!
makan terakhir sebelum menginjakan kaki k jakarta .. berhenti d restoran besar namun sederhana..gw pergi k toilet sebelum makan...dan saat gw msk k restoran , ternyataaa..gw ktmu LAGI sm "org tdk d knal" itu!! "oh god..is he my soulmate??" gw beranjak dr meja tmpt gw mkn dan ambil minum .. dan saat gw berbalik , sesosok pria tinggi ada d hadapan gw ... percakapan pun terjadi .

org tdk d knal : "heii..yg td kan ?!hehhe"
gw : "oh..iyaaa..haha yg tadi.."
org tdk d knal : "boleh knalan??"
gw : "oh iya boleh...fitri :)"
org tdk d knal : "WIRA...blh minta nomer hape ?"
gw : "he?! iya iya boleh...(sambil menyebutkan nomer hp gw)"
org tdk d knal : "hmm..makasih ya..oiya , duluan yaa..busnya udh mw jalan...byeee :)" (sambil tersenyum maniisss bgt)
gw : (bengong)

smp d bus , dia sms gw dan kita pun memulai dgn percakapan kecil , sapaan , berkenalan , dan mulai bercerita ..
sedikit tentang dia ..
*namanya Wira Mahiswara , berasal dari Bali asli , hanya saja dia lg kuliah d STAN jakarta .. saat itu dia emg lg libur kuliah dan liburan k bali sekalian pulang k rumah .. dan d perjalanan saat ktmu gw itu , dia lg dlm prjalanan mw balik k jakarta lg bwt nerusia kuliahnya d semester akhir..dia mahasiswa administrasi perpajakan d STAN .yeah..i know he smart ! since first i meet him ! :))* "nice to be your friend wira :D

hmm,,dia punya nama panggilan khusus bwt gw , It's "NURI" .. d ambil dr singkatan nama gw , "nur fitryani" .. hahhaa..

setelah lama kita berkenalan...gw pun kehilangan kabarnya , dan smp pd akhirnya gw balikan sma mantan gw , dan putus lg beberapa bulan kemudian..
dan saat itu , entah knp gw kepikiran dia , dan memutuskan utk menghubunginya lagi..gw sms dia ..

gw : "haii wira :)"

dan gak d bales sm dia...
beberapa hari kemudian , tepatnya 1 hari sebelum gw UAN , dia bls sms gw ..

wira : "iya,,maaf ini siapa ya?"
gw : "nuri..masih inget ?"
wira : "oh iyaaa..NURIII!! apa kabar???"
gw : "baik wira ,, wira gimana??"
..............................
dan obrolan pun terjalin lg...senangnyaaa bisa dpt kabarnya lg :)
tapi ternyata obrolan itu berlangsung lama...kita pun dekat .. dekat .. dan semakin dekat..
dia org pertama yg mengirimkan sms sebelum gw UAN , ksh semangat kecil lewat pesan singkat yg menurut gw sangat berarti..
jd satu"nya org yg perhatian atas apa yg gw lakuin ..
jd org yg nemenin gw d setiap hari gw..
pagi,,siang,,malam..dan itu membuatku....JATUH CINTA padanya :")
oh god...i'm fallin in love with him :(

satu hal yg gw paling inget sm isi sms dia yg mendongengkan tentang bagaimana cara kita bertemu..dongeng itu d berikan saat gw sulit utk tdr pas menjelang UAN ..hahaha..he's so cute :">

kita semakin deket , dan mulai sering jalan bareng..
nonton bioskop , makan , dan banyak hal lainnya..
berbagi cerita , bertengkar , ah .. semuanya kita lakuin bersama..
gw mulai merasa membutuhkannya .. gak bisa gda dia .. mungkin gw mulai tergantung sm dia..
entah salah atau ngga .. dan makin lama gw makin tersiksa sm perasaan gw sendiri ,, krn setelah sekian lama dkt sm dia , gda satu pun status yg dia pastika untk gw .. pacar ? bukan .. temen ? tp deketnya lbh dr tmn..
dan smp pd akhirnya gw duduk berdua sm dia , dan gw blg yg sejujurnya klo gw sayang sm dia ,, and anyone kmow ?? HE SAY , IF HE LOVEs ME TOO !! aaaa...god .. i'm happy..
i know , we've become lovers at the time :)
gda yg lbh bahagia dr saat itu .. tp gak bertahan lama...
1 bln kemudia dia menjauh dr gw krn sesuatu hal...entah lah .. gw jg bingung knp dia kyk gt..
mungkin dia sebenrnya gak syg sm gw , atau apa...yg jelas semenjak saat itu , dia gak percaya perasaan gw k dia..dan bahkan dia gatau apa yg sbrnya ada d hati gw..
gw nangis , sedih , kesel , dia pun gtw ..
gw mulai coba bwt gak perduli .. tp gbs .. susaaahh !!

dan smp pd akhirnya dia dkt sm cewe yg dia pilih..
gw seneng .. yaa , gw ikut seneng ngliat dia bahagia...
tp satu sisi d hati gw sulit bwt terima itu...
gpp , gw tau ini yg terbaik bwt gw dan dia..
berkali" gw coba bwt perbaikin semuanya jg gda artinya , dia jg gak akan menoleh k arah gw lg.. gw gtw siapa yg salah dsini..
gw cm mw ngejalanin hubungan yg sehat .. bnr" kyk org pacaran normal .. dan gw berharap banyak sm dia ,, gw bs ngejalanin hubungan serius sm dia , tp malah kyk gt jdnya..
nyesel ?! yaa gw nyesel..tp bwt apa nyesel trs ?! gak guna !


smp skr , hubungan gw sm dia msh cukup baik .
walau dia udh sangat ACUH sm gw . but , it's oke !
sayang?
iya .. sayang itu masih ada .. tp gak untuk d buka lg .. cukup d tutup rapat" aja , krn gw tau dia gak punya perasaan itu sedikitpun bwt gw sejak dulu..mungkin hanya nafsu yg menguasai...entah..yg jelas..dia pernah membuat gw bangga saat berjalan d sampingnya..

sosok pintar , tinggi , baik , dan penyayang itu pernah ada disini..didalam hati gw paling dalam ..
kapanpun dia mau tersenyum k gw lg , gw siap ksh dia senyuman terbaik gw bwt dia..just for him :))
gak perduli dia udh berbuat apa k gw , yg udh bikin gw sakit , bikin air mata gw menetes banyak , bikin hati gw hancur .. itu bukan masalah bwt gw ..
nyokap jg selalu banyak tanya tentang dia , seperti ,, bagaimana hubungan gw sm dia , apa kabarnya , dia gimana sekarang...dan gw cm bs jawab "kita baik-baik aja :)"

dan semoga , kita emg akan selalu baik" aja dengan apapun status hubungan kita..

"wira tetep yang terbaik buat nuri..walaupan wira sering bilang klo wira *i'm not good boy* , tp nuri tau klo wira cowo baik yang pantes diharapkan...makasi wira bwt semuanya...maaf klo pernah ada yg nuri lakuin dan itu mmbuat wira marah,kecewa,atw sedih..itu d luar dugaan nuri..bahagia terus yaa sm semua pilihan wira :') "

eyes fish (mata ikan)

ini cerita tentang Mata Ikan .. yeah .. penyakit mata ikan . bukan mata ikan beneran !hahaa..
tmn kosan gw ada yg kena penyakit itu d sela" jari kakinya , udh hampir 1 bulan gak sembuh" , dan selama itu pula dy gak periksa k dokter ..
katanya makin lama makin sakit . dan smp pd akhirnya kmrn dy udh gak tahan , gw paksa dy bwt periksa k klinik kampus ,, pagi" td gw sm mair (tmn gw itu) k klinik ..
dy periksa ,, dan kata dokternya .. "yah,,ini harus d angkat..." JEEENGG JEEENGG !! hahaha..awesome ! cool man ! mata ikannya katanya udh trllu dalem akarnya jd harus d angkat . yeah , itu sama aja kyk OPERASI KECIL ! haduuuh , mair udh lemes aja pas tau trnyta sakit yg d sepelein malah jd kyk gt ..
dan akhirnya tuh dokter menganjurkan mair bwt dtng jam stngh 8 mlm bwt nglakuin tugas mulia itu ... gw sm oni pun nganter mair k klinik lg td jam stngh 8 mlm..
dan kita ngedampingin mair yg kakinya lg d udek" ama tuh dokter..gilaaaa gw yg ngeliat aja serem mameeenn..
nah , inilah tahap" tuh dokter ngutak-atik kaki mair :
1) d bius TIGA KALI !!
2) d gunting daging yg d singgahi sii mata ikan tersebut .
3) darah keluar secara berlebihan .
4) d jahit 3 jaitan .
5) d bungkus .
6) dan siap untuk d bawa pulang .. *lhooo..emg makanan* ahahahhaa..

yah , kurang lebih td gt lah proses menakutkan itu terjadi , dan gw cm bs merem melek ngeliatin mair d gtuin .. haduuuhh..sabar ya mair..
abis sls d operasi , gw , oni , mair balik k kosan ..
smp kosan , mair udh nangis" aja .. katanya obat biusnya udh ilang..sakitnya mulai berasa bgt .. gak tahan katanya dy..gak tega jdnya :((
yaudah , dy mnm obat yg dksh dokter , gw bikinin teh anget , dan nemenin dia sebentar d kamarnya ..
lama" dy tenang dan gak nangis lg..GOOD JOB MAIR !! hahaha..

"mair...get well soon yaaa darlene...we praying for you always baby :) come on , proof that your pain okey ! don't cry again . we love you darl :* "




(yah..beginilah keadaan kakinya setelah d bedah.hehhee)

sorry , i let you down .

i ever love someone ..
he was my friend when i senior high school frist .
i love him slowly , without coercion , truly from my heart..
finally ,, we had a relationship more than just friends . yeah , he's to be my boyfriend .
we also live with a good relationship without the slightest problem ,,
even...........because of this relationship is too good i got bored and felt that this relationship is very tastless :(
i know i was wrong ! but i've not stand him anymore !! i swear ! i'm bored if i still with him !!
he's too good for me..
whatever i do , he always say "yes..yes..yes" although i am doing it wrong !
imagine that ... certainly BORED yeah ?! :'(
the longer ... i'm increasingly uncomfortablewith him ! seriously ! i really feel that !!!
i'm annoyed with he's attitude that makes him so good to look like a sissy . yeah SISSY !! *sorry i say that*
i so feel that he's a coward ! just because he can't acted as a real man and he can't acted as a real boyfriend ...
he's not bad , honestly i say if he very good boy .... but it'svery excessive to me :'(
precisely this attitude that makes me sick and tired of going out with him ..
i also can't dodge if i regret having hurt him , and i rarely don't give him a chance in the hope he could change and act like a real boyfriend .. who can complain when i do something wrong , get angry when i didn't contact him , and certainly can say NO !!
sure , i wanna him like that..
of course not mean i don't accept him what it is !! NO .. certainly not that !!
i just want him to realize that he too made our relationship became very ordinary !

and finally ..
because i can't take it anymore living relationship with him ,, i decided to END RELATIONSHIP THE TWO OF US ! i know that's a wrong decision . but i have to do that .
certainly for the good of me and him :')
honestly ,, I HAD NO SENSE OF LOVE FOR HIM ANYMORE ! i'm sorry about that .


oh yaa..
27-june-2010 ..
i know it's your b'day .. sorry if i'm being indifferent and not care about your happy day it was .
i'm just don't want to make you remember with me anymore ..
and please .. i beg you ,, DON'T EVER GIVE ME ANOTHER CHANCE TO HURT YOU :(
i don't want do that anymore ... i could never bear to see you sad and think about me anymore :'(
you're too good for me !
you're happy with a woman who deserves much better than me for sure .
sorry..i just don't love you no more ..
HAPPY B'DAY FOR YOU ... wish you all the best boy :D

once again , i just wanna say "sorry"

bye....acquire your happiness :))